Monday, July 28, 2008
TWO WEEKS ALONE WITH 5 CHILDREN UNDER 5 YRS!!!
While I was preparing for the first time to be all alone with our five Little's for two weeks, I was planning to call and schedule some friends to come and help. There have been so many great friends who have told me to just call on them when we need help. So, I have a little list. Jerry kept asking me who I was going to schedule while he and Jonathan were in Colorado and Ellie was in China. But, every time I tried to plan it I just had no peace about calling anyone. I thought I was just too busy and would eventually get it scheduled but, every time I tried, I just had no peace about it. As I was praying one night, it was as if the Lord said He wanted me to do this alone, just with HIM, that HE had something HE wanted to teach me in this! I felt like I was to just take one day at a time, pray for everything I needed and to stay home and enjoy these precious children. I have to admit I was very scared!! I haven't been all alone with 5 children under five for two weeks in my entire life. Not only taking care of the kids, but doing all the chores, cooking, shopping and even taking out the huge heavy trash cans every week...we make a lot of trash and they are very heavy!! So, I prayed for strength, patience, good health, rest and most of all to be a blessing to these kids and not a screaming, stressed out nightmare. I had a fear that I was going to be so stressed out and exhausted that I would loose it. But as usual, I was wrong and worried for no reason. Why don't I trust in HIM more??? He always proves himself to be faithful!!
I am amazed at how well the two weeks went. I felt strangely calm and peaceful and I intentionally made time to sit and play with them, talk with them, listen to them and really enjoy them. When everyone is home, there is a lot more noise, stress and business. It is difficult to just focus on them because I have so many other people needing something from me, or just having many other interruptions. I was very relaxed and we really had a lot of fun. We worked on the alphabet, writing, art projects, play-doh, music time, dancing, singing, ate out under the tent on our back deck, played in the rain, watched movies, read and walked and rode bikes. Every night when I put them all down, I was exhausted, but I was sincerely shocked that the day when so well and I THANKED GOD! Each day I was so surprised because I fully expected the following day couldn't go so well again.
One morning I woke up to the boys shaking me saying; "MAMA, come on, we have a surprise for you, come quick." I opened my eyes to see that the three little men were already dressed in their matching outfits. The twinettes were still asleep. They held my hand and walked me down the hallway to show off that their beds were already made and their room was spotless. Then it was downstairs to the kitchen where they had worked as a team, to make breakfast!! They had the table set with bowls full of cereal and milk already in it, napkins, cups, spoons and even a can of peaches. Jeremiah said; "Look Mama, I even put out the peaches cause we have to feed our bodies good stuff too, right". I stood there in shock! They have never done anything like this before. The twins have seen Jerry and the older kids do breakfast and surprise me on special occasions but, never have they done anything like this on their own and without adult supervision. The three of them, James & Jeremiah 5 yrs old now, and Josiah only 3 yrs. old, stood there looking at me so proud and happy waiting for me to sit down and eat with them. As I did, my eyes filled with tears and my heart filled with love and joy as it seemed like I heard a whisper from the Lord saying "SEE I DIDN'T GIVE YOU MORE THAN YOU CAN HANDLE!!" I sat with the boys eating soggy cheerios and choking on my tears. I THANKED MY GOD" for radically changing my world when HE told me to step out in faith and rescue these orphans. HE clearly told us to pursue adoption and when I think back at how we struggled with fear of the unknown on this journey I am so ashamed. HE knew all along that HE had these blessings in store for me and I am so grateful. In the words of Kay Warren, I have been "GLORIOUSLY RUINED" for the plight of the orphan and I shudder to think of what my life would be like if I didn't have these precious children. I no longer have fear or anxiety about being alone with my 5 Littles. They are absolutely amazing children!! I have yet again entered into a deeper level of understanding, peace, love and faith as a result of this wonderful experience.
"HEAR MY CRY, O GOD; ATTEND UNTO MY PRAYER. FROM THE END OF THE EARTH WILL I CRY UNTO THEE, WHEN MY HEART IS OVERWHELMED; LEAD ME TO THE ROCK THAT IS HIGHER THAN I. FOR THOU HAST BEEN A SHELTER FOR ME, AND A STRONG TOWER FROM THE ENEMY."